A helpful list when dealing with a young woman with BRCA1 or 2 (or anyone in your practice):
1. Put your eyes back in their sockets. I may be young and I know I have huge risk factors. However, it is not comforting to be looked at as if I need a bomb squad in the room to diffuse my chest and ovaries.
2. Find the difficult balance between empathy/concern paired with a plan of action. Too much concern makes me feel pitied, or worse yet, that you have no idea how to help me and that I'm on my farewell tour.
3. I'm NOT sick! Mmmm'k pumpkin?!
4. Too many facts and pressure make me feel like I'm not a person. I do have options other than your obvious favorite.
5. Don't whisper to co-workers anywhere within earshot of your patients. Just don't.
6. Do not impose your preferences on your patient. You job is to inform and support the choices made. Allow me to feel that I am still in control of the choices I make in my life--for better or worse. If a person is too fearful they will rush a decision they aren't ready for. Worse, if they are stubborn, they'll wait too long.
7. I'm NOT sick! Got it?
8. Refer me to a specialist when I'm clearly educating you on the details of this gene. I'm not trying to be difficult. I'm being my own advocate. I know you must be hurting for patients with how you are trying to keep you under your care. Stop it. Get me to someone who can help me.
9. What and how would you tell your mom, sister, or friend?
Be sincere and a thoughtful listener who responds to questions. Do not rush. Panic does not help anyone make an informed choice.
10. I'm NOT sick! Good talk.
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